EXPERIENCE #70: PUTTING MYSELF IN PERHAPS THE MOST DEGRADING POSITION OF MY LIFE EVER...LITERALLY

The very idea of getting a back, sack and crack wax is something that I think every young man dabbles with at some point.

We live in extremely open minded times and there is absolutely nothing wrong with removing ones hair from ones pubic region thank you very much.

Whilst getting mildly tanked up on cider down on the harbor side yesterday, it was decided that my experience for today would be to get a homemade version of this delicate and intricate beauty practice done.

That evening we picked up some hair removal cream and wax strips on the way home, I then headed out on an evening of more drinking.

Consequently, I awoke feeling like death with thoughts of waxing my jangly bits way, way, waaay at the back of my mind amongst all the hurt, regret and nausea.

However, when I realized I had like an hour before I caught the coach home I was struck with the realization that it was now or never; when asked to make my choice I foolishly went with the first option.

We did decide however that perhaps the bum would be enough for one session and that if I wanted to continue further afield I could take some strips home with me in a goody bag and do it in my own time.

Okay, so I want to treat the description of this new experience with as much politeness and decency that is actually possible when describing the removal of ass hair, however readers I think you need to be aware that this is never in a million years going to be nice discussion and if you're easily offended or quick to become nauseous then stop reading now.

Ahem, it really didn't hurt as much I had imagined it ever would. In all honesty the levels of violation for both my friends, my brother and myself during the whole experience were probably the worst part of it all.

The hair removal cream made the whole affair far more slippy and its colour, texture and aroma were extremely off putting. The budget wax strips hardly worked at all either which was a little frustrating for both waxer and waxee (sorry Ter).

Regardless, we got through it and to be honest I think that it's pulled us closer together. I suppose in many ways it's like being a birthing partner, just, well the opposite way round...hmm.

Anyway in many ways I am pleased with the end result. It all feels a little different down there and I'm concerned about the possibility of chafing at a later date but for now I'm content in knowing I'm hair free and looking great!

In hindsight I can now see that probably my worst decisions are made whilst drunk and that I should perhaps remember that once sober I can still say no. I'm also becoming suspicious of the fact that all experiences involving Teri involve defacing my body in some shape or form.

I do owe her a big thank you though and a total dedication to her and Mel (on video camera) and Jay (on photo camera), I'm here if you ever want the favor returned. x